Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Randomize
