and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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