I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
