I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
