She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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