She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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