do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
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