And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Randomize
