i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
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