So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize