would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
