I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I have so many feelings about this burrito
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
