we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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