So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Randomize
