well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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