dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
