everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
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I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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