"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
