okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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