like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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