the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize