yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
These 27 Hilarious People Wrote Their Own Obituaries
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
23 Men Confess What Gifts Would Brighten Their Day
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.