Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.

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  (313): Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra. http://tfl.nu/n0j6
  Replies (5) Good night (2047) Bad night (886)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back

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  (617): but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back http://tfl.nu/ogq4
  Replies (30) Good night (1056) Bad night (2380)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.

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  (732): They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody. http://tfl.nu/blud
  Replies (55) Good night (11203) Bad night (1238)
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  (432): View more from Texas

  ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...

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  (432): ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today... http://tfl.nu/2fwj
  Replies (11) Good night (2449) Bad night (1093)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS

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  (914): Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS http://tfl.nu/w0yg
  Replies (34) Good night (11002) Bad night (1485)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.

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  (423): it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise. http://tfl.nu/943e
  Replies (25) Good night (7609) Bad night (1116)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?

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  (832): Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities? http://tfl.nu/5gd1
  Replies (33) Good night (1076) Bad night (7187)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed

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  (561): Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed http://tfl.nu/ippt
  Replies (9) Good night (2644) Bad night (949)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?

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  (269): He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated? http://tfl.nu/6x14
  Replies (16) Good night (1032) Bad night (3847)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.

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  (570): Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan. http://tfl.nu/2zix
  Replies (4) Good night (1146) Bad night (585)
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  (310): View more from California

  This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat

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  (310): This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat http://tfl.nu/hcj2
  Replies (1) Good night (901) Bad night (656)
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  (359): View more from

  A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.

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  (359): A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying. http://tfl.nu/5q6d
  Replies (3) Good night (472) Bad night (671)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago

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  (443): If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago http://tfl.nu/tavn
  Replies (4) Good night (464) Bad night (424)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE

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  (201): Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE http://tfl.nu/qbca
  Replies (3) Good night (297) Bad night (483)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.

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  (607): He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw. http://tfl.nu/um2r
  Replies (6) Good night (236) Bad night (665)

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