Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger http://tfl.nu/soaz
  Replies (12) Good night (647) Bad night (1113)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  how was the sex?

  (1-618): View more from Illinois

  he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.

  (618): View more from Illinois

  well, there's that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): how was the sex? (1-618): he smelled like pickles and burnt hair. (618): well, there's that. http://tfl.nu/wrio
  Replies (22) Good night (839) Bad night (3768)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret' http://tfl.nu/447f
  Replies (55) Good night (1544) Bad night (17172)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth. http://tfl.nu/qs80
  Replies (10) Good night (3345) Bad night (993)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.

  (1-218): View more from Minnesota

  i gets down

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down. (1-218): i gets down http://tfl.nu/usv6
  Replies (14) Good night (3806) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions. http://tfl.nu/e8p3
  Replies (27) Good night (5064) Bad night (842)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality. http://tfl.nu/dmqi
  Replies (9) Good night (2178) Bad night (1084)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots http://tfl.nu/44j2
  Replies (4) Good night (736) Bad night (1684)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard... http://tfl.nu/5xwe
  Replies (8) Good night (670) Bad night (1068)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (240): She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths http://tfl.nu/lqw0
  Replies (2) Good night (881) Bad night (324)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating http://tfl.nu/ns48
  Replies (2) Good night (1071) Bad night (469)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination. http://tfl.nu/22p5
  Replies (4) Good night (505) Bad night (296)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner? http://tfl.nu/fpx9
  Replies (4) Good night (956) Bad night (519)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year! http://tfl.nu/390j
  Replies (13) Good night (506) Bad night (1319)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good http://tfl.nu/dysc
  Replies (1) Good night (930) Bad night (319)

Randomize