Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
21 Horny People Confess Their Boldest Sexual Advances
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
29 Shocking Confessions That People Thought Were A Joke
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.