I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize