I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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