$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
