I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
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