so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
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