Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
My feet surprised me
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
