I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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