do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
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we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
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Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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