Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
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