I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I can't trust your balls anymore.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Randomize
