Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
