I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
