How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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