Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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