His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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