Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
