how can u be prego again
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Randomize