My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
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