I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
