Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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