You really coming over, don't trick.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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