those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
