so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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