Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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