Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
