White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize