turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize