You're so nebulous sometimes
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
