Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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